The stupidity of Artificial Intelligence

"The mind of an intelligent soul acquires knowledge; the ears of the wise seek out knowledge." Proverbs 18:15

This has not been a good week in the world of Artificial Intelligence. I’d call it AI, but I hate that the capital I (eye) and the lower case l (el) look so much alike (depending on the font one is using). I hate it even worse that I have to spell out two words containing 22 letters when I can use the two letter abbreviation. What can I say? I’m lazy.

The problem with AI is that it really isn’t. It is artificial, of course, but it isn’t intelligent. It has been a long time since I have called a business of any sort and gotten a human being to answer the phone. Even one person shops answer the phone with an automated system that reads out your options so that the proprietor can finish his or her sandwich and coffee before talking to you.

I had a technical problem with my internet provider last week, so I called them up and got the expected list of options – none of which is ever an agent or operator. I really wish companies would find a new voice for their answering systems. I think Star Trek’s Majel Barrett would be fine, for she made it clear that she was a computer speaking. I don’t know who does the voice for the majority of office systems, but her phoneside manner leaves a lot to be desired.

The internet provider’s AI operator did not like me asking to speak to an agent. She kept directing me to go online and address the problems there. I explained that I had no internet, so I couldn’t do what she (it) had requested. She thanked me for my time and hung up on me. Twice!

The third time was the charm as I finally found my way through the electronic jungle to a real human being and between us got the matter taken care of.

Artificial Intelligence. It isn’t. I find myself reading articles that are obviously produced by AI. They purport to have been authored by some sort of writer, but I find a complete lack of spirit when I read said articles. They tend to begin and end the same. They gather information and spit it out in predictable patterns, but there’s no life in them. They’re more vapid than my earliest sermons!

The real problem with AI isn’t that it is artificial or dumb. The problem is that our expectations are probably higher than what the current iterations can provide. Sadly, I wonder how many people are displaced by such machines. There is an economic benefit to using AI in place of people. 

There is a side of me that thinks (for a moment) that I might like to have AI produce a column for me on those rare occasions I don’t feel like writing, but deep down I would feel like I was cheating. I would know I didn’t write it, even if I took the time to set up the program to write a 700 word puff piece on why you should think or act differently (although that’s, obviously, not my real purpose and goal), or feel better (or at least a bit entertained).

Well, AI has its place, and there’s not much I or anybody else can do to change that. It’s evolving, even if I’m not. What I’m more interested in is real intelligence, real wisdom. It’s not enough to know stuff, to know facts. It’s knowing what all that stuff means. It’s knowing how to apply that knowledge to the problems we have or the issues we face. 

I don’t expect wisdom from AI. If the computer doesn’t know enough not to hang up on a paying customer (twice!), I'm not going to trust it to recommend purchasing options online, let alone anything more significant.

No, we are here to take care of God’s creation and one another, and that’s not something that can be assigned to a digital brain. Some things we just have to figure out on our own. I just find it’s easier to do that if I have flesh and blood to talk to, rather than dots and dashes, or zeros and ones here in this, our valley.

Keith Axberg writes on matters concerning life and faith. Author of: Who the Blazes is Jesus? Good News for a Vulgar World (available through Amazon in Print and e-book)