The Passion of Compassion

 "Compassion is the ability to see how it all is." Ram Dass

Mother Teresa once said, “If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.”  One of my goals for 2021 is to become more compassionate. That may not seem like much, but I got to thinking about how Covid-isolation has affected me, and in my meditations and contemplations it has occurred to me that I don’t have a good handle on how the pandemic is affecting others because in my isolation, I have simply lost touch with people outside of my “pod.”

I think many people are suffering from Covid-fatigue. I know when the pandemic first hit, we became hyper-vigilant. I was aware of every sneeze, cough, or physical sensation that seemed to line up with symptoms of the disease. I dutifully wore my mask whenever I went to the store, wiped down the trolleys with the sanitizing rags at the store entrances, and stopped buying fresh fruits and vegetables (because I didn’t dare lick my fingers to open those silly plastic bags they provide for fresh produce). When I got home I would bring in the groceries, wash my hands, put the groceries away, and wash my hands yet again.

Although I still mask up whenever I go to the store (and still don’t lick my fingers), I’m not nearly as fastidious with the wipes. I don’t wash my hands quite as vigorously or often as I once did. I avoid public spaces as best I can and have gotten used to not shaking hands with strangers or hugging friends and family.

We are told that touch is critical for good mental health, and I believe it. Although I am not a hugger by nature, I do like the customary niceties of shaking hands with people I am meeting for the first time or when conducting business. I miss giving and receiving hugs with close friends and family on social occasions (that are now so rare). My natural hugging circle has always been small, but today it is miniscule and far too tiny – and I am all the smaller for it.

When we get tinier, it seems our capacity to feel and empathize may also get smaller. We become like Tinker Bell who, being quite petite, was neither all good or all bad; she only had room for one feeling at a time. I’m beginning to feel that way, too. Sadly, it seems it is the nice feelings that got edged out first.

Thanksgiving came. I wanted to be thankful, but it came out with a Meh. Then came the pre-Christmas season of Advent and gift-buying, but my joy came out Bleh. Then Christmas Day and our Pod celebration. My soul experienced the “celebration” with an inner eye-roll. Even the cinnamon rolls didn’t sweeten my disposition (which was cleverly hidden by a well-practiced series of smiles, oohs, and ahs).

No, growing smallness tends to push away the nicer feelings, leaving room only for the grumps (with or without the letter g). As usual, when my emotions go awry, I’ve found the best solution is to take actions which give lie to those feelings, and replace them with an attitude one prefers to cultivate.

I believe God calls us to embrace one another both literally and figuratively, because God knows we need one another for both our physical, social, and spiritual well-being. Isolation makes me very selfish. How selfish? Well, I don’t even want to share that insight with you! Wow!!!

So when I am feeling selfish or close-hearted, I need to find ways to reach out beyond my own skin. I need to get out of my own skull (for that is one dark and dreary neighborhood). I need to talk to others and ask how they’re doing. I need to find ways to be of service. I need to stop whining (although, to be honest, I’m quite good at it) and simply do things that bring pleasure all around.

The fact is, life is good. I survived the pandemic; I survived 2020; a vaccine is en route (as will be hugs and handshakes). Compassion begets passion, and that’s good enough for me. I hope it will be good enough for you, too, here in this, our valley.

Keith Axberg writes on matters concerning life and faith. Author of newly released: Who the Blazes is Jesus? Good News for a Vulgar World (available exclusively through Amazon in Print and e-book)