I am running away, but I
prefer to call it a strategic retreat – Tennessee Williams
I was scanning the internet the other day. Sometimes this
activity is known as killing time, although, to be honest, time has been
killing me for years. If you don’t believe me, come on over and take a look. So
I found myself tumbling through some random spots online and found a gif (a
brief moving picture or clip that runs for about 1 or 2 seconds). It was the
picture of a sailboat where the sail was adjusted for the wind, and as the
canvass swung from one side to the other, it caught and tossed a sailor into
the sea.
That’s all there was to the image, and I found myself
briefly wondering, hoping (and presuming) the sailor was retrieved by his
fellow yachtsmen. Beyond that, though, I found it quite comical and
entertaining – not unlike some Buster Keaton or Charlie Chaplin bit.
As we head into the dog days of summer, it occurs to me that
some folks may be struggling with bouts of boredom and looking for ways to stay
busy. As a service to my readers, then, I thought I would provide you with my
top ten list of things to do when the mosquitos are biting and the fish aren’t
– and you’re looking for some sort of reprieve from those flaccid days of
summer. In no particular order, here goes:
Coming in at #10, go inside, close the drapes and blinds,
select a decade, and binge watch your favorite TV show. Bonanza will probably
take you almost to Halloween!
At #9, do a search on Tumblr, select a topic of interest,
and follow the Links, Likes, and Followings until you get back to where you
started – or Christmas (whichever comes first).
At #8, hop in the car or truck and see how far into the
mountains you can get. Then hop out and see how long it takes for anyone to
notice you’re missing. Remember, your local Search and Rescue team needs
practice, so this would be a genuine community service. And for all those times
your better half has asked you to Get Lost, you can show them how much you
really DO listen!
At #7, when telemarketers call, ask them to hang on; then go
water your lawn, wash your dishes, plan a deck party, or run to the store and
do some grocery shopping. Warning: Do this only with your landline. Charges may
apply against your cellular plan, so check with your attorney first.
At #6, sit down and address your Christmas cards. Begin your
annual Christmas letter, starting each paragraph with a succeeding letter of
the alphabet. Your friends and family will LOVE it!
Coming in at #5, close your windows, turn off your lights,
climb into bed with flannel sheets and turn on your electric blanket and
pretend it is winter. You may not get much rest, but you’ll quickly drop a few
pounds and fit into those clothes you’ve been storing since 1977.
At #4, head over to your favorite community service
organization and ask them how you can (gasp) be of service. Offer them the gift
of your time, talent, or treasure (whichever works best for them). Make a commitment
and stick with it.
At #3, take a stroll downtown, block the sidewalk and talk
with visitors and friends. Grab a soft drink or water, look at traffic on the
main drag through town, take a deep breath, and remember that’s what folks in
big cities deal with all year long. Exhale, and offer God a note of thanks.
At #2, call a friend or family member you haven’t seen or
talked to in a long time, and catch up. Note: Hang up on the telemarketer
first.
And finally, coming in at #1: Go outside and when the first
star appears, don’t make a wish. Just be thankful, and enjoy the view, for
you’re closer to heaven than you can possibly know.
No comments:
Post a Comment